Whenever I’m at a conference—whether it’s my own or anyone else’s—I can always spot someone who is stuck. He—or she, but it’s usually a he—is trying to look busy playing on his phone in the back, waiting for me outside of the bathroom or near the door after the end of a presentation. He’s looking for hope and he’s scared, but trying to play it off like everything is great.
It’s always the same. He comes up to me, or sometimes I’ll go up to him, and we start talking about their business. It always starts with the good. He talks about how well his business is doing. He will not crush his own ego. He’s desperate to protect it. But, eventually, something will leak and the bad will come out and he’ll admit that there’s an issue. Great, we’re finally being honest. But, here’s the thing, he’s developed a victim mindset and convinced himself that he will always be in a bad place. Then, what he’ll do is explain he did something, probably something he’s already tried, just to say he’s done it or he’s tried it, that will perpetuate this mentality. The truth is, most people that are stuck, they’re not willing to do the work that’s needed. I’ll give him advice, but whether or not he actually does the work is on him. Many people just do not want to do the work or really admit to themselves that there’s an issue.
It’s like being stuck in quicksand. That little twig is not going to help you, but it’s easier and more appealing to grab onto than the slimy vine, but that’s what’s actually going to help you. You need to be willing to get your hands dirty. The key is to admit you’re stuck. Once you do that, you’ll have a breakthrough. If you’re not willing to do that, you’ll be stuck for the rest of your life. You can’t leave a place that you never actually admit that you’re in.
Here’s my message out there to those that are stuck: the facts are the facts, but the facts are not the truth. Let me repeat that, the facts are the facts, but the facts are not the truth. What I mean is, the fact is that you’re in a bad place, but that is not your truth. You’re confusing the facts for the truth. You will not always be in a bad place unless you allow yourself to believe that that is your truth. The situation is that you’re in a bad spot, but you don’t live in a bad spot. My account once told me, “Aaron, what do you do when you find yourself in hell? Keep walking.”
I want to encourage those out there that are struggling to stop lying to themselves, grab that vine, get your hands dirty and do something about it. Sometimes, going to someone in the hall and asking for help is all you need to do. Find the money to go to a conference. If you don’t have the money to go to a conference, borrow it. Reach out to someone within your industry. Read every article like this you can. Get all of the information possible that is available to you for this industry. Understand that you need to get everything you can to grow. If you don’t do anything, you’ll be in this situation six months from now. Stop confusing facts for truth.
